Three U's Fewer

Today's Herring is an easy one. At least, we know in whose general direction to hurl it in: Venezuela's.

Now, whether we're trying to hit corrupt government officials, or the disgraced Ugueth Urbina, is unclear. But one of them has behaved very badly.

Urbina (known as the only pitcher in Major League history with the initials U.U.U., not to mention the closer for the 2003 World Champion Florida Marlins, and a strong money pitcher generally) has been sentenced to 14 years in a Venezuelan prison for an incident at his ranch involving machetes, gasoline, and some deeply conflicting versions of events.

It's the feiry celebrity who had his minions butcher a handfull of strangers -- or, it's the corrupt South-of-the-border system that would end a man's career (and subject him to who-knows-what horrible conditions in that cell) in the desperate hope to squeeze every ounce of blood from the stone, bribe-arily speaking.

One suspects the system, the same one that allowed a pack of bandits to kidnap Urbina's mother just two springs ago and hold her for an eight-figure ransom. But events are fuzzy, and this one just doesn't have enough information for the Gringos to suss out. (Put it this way; Urbina's constant free-agent bouncing around -- and lack of affiliation with a deep-pocketed Major League franchise -- could conceivably cost him his life.)

The one thing we know is we can't blink our eyes and forget this one happened.

Oh wait.

Yes, we can.

-Zed

QWTOFDY
"I've noticed those with the most opinions often have the fewest facts."
-Bethania McKenstry